Now that I think about it, I had diabetes from a young age. I experienced not only strong drowsiness after meals, but also it interfered with my daily life. In my 20s, my weight was close to 100kg, and in my 30s, it reached a maximum of 120kg. In my 20s, I suddenly lost weight once, and I wondered what was happening. It seems that weight can suddenly decrease when diabetes progresses. At that time, I had just started going to the gym, so I thought it was due to that, but now I think it's more likely that I had diabetes. At that time, I was also experiencing power harassment and moral harassment from my superiors at work, so I considered the possibility that I lost weight due to the mental stress, but it seems more likely that it was simply that diabetes happened to progress at that timing.

In health checkups, I was considered obese. Especially when I was young, I often experienced strong drowsiness during work, and I couldn't endure it even when talking to someone or during meetings. I didn't understand that this was a physical illness called diabetes, so I couldn't get it understood by myself or those around me. My superiors would often say things like, "I've never felt that sleepy at work," which was frustrating. I was working long hours in IT, often more than others, so I was told, "If you can produce results even while sleeping, that's fine. It's like you're producing twice the output, considering the time you're sleeping." It wasn't a problem at work, but I often felt so drowsy that I would lose consciousness and close my eyes while talking to someone, which I think was quite abnormal.

In my daily life, the feeling of being dazed seemed to have started with mental problems related to bullying I experienced as a child. In addition to that, drowsiness and fatigue from diabetes were added, but at the time, I thought it was just a mental problem. In a state of mental distress, I made the wrong choices to improve my mental state, and I think I started eating a lot of heavy meals and consuming sugary desserts, sweets, and sugary drinks. As a result of these wrong choices, I developed diabetes, and I think I had both depression from childhood bullying and diabetes. I think I was earnestly drinking sugary vegetable juices, believing advertisements like "Drink vegetable juice to solve the problem of insufficient vegetable intake," which led me straight to diabetes. I also tried health maintenance products like supplements, but they were ultimately just adding more food, so they had no effect. Similarly, products that claimed to maintain health with tea also had no effect.

In my teens, I experienced depression due to bullying. In my 20s, I had lingering depression and the onset of diabetes. In my 30s, my depression had largely improved, but my diabetes progressed. Recently, both conditions have improved significantly. While my depression had been gradually improving since I was young, my diabetes was difficult to treat, and I experienced significant drowsiness for about 10 years, with occasional mild symptoms afterward.

Recently, I have reached a point where I have lost weight and, although not completely, I have managed to escape the obese category. Although I still have a protruding belly, the pants I used to wear are now loose, indicating that I had a lot of fat around my abdomen before.

I believe that in Japan, there is a tendency to view physical problems caused by diabetes, such as mental distress, solely as mental issues. There is a tendency to simply say "Give it your all!" like in the Showa era, without considering the body as being sick, and to treat people with mental distress as "mentally abnormal." However, in the case of common illnesses like diabetes, mental distress is often simply a manifestation of physical problems. I believe that this tendency in Japan, which focuses only on the mental state without considering the body or conducting thorough examinations, has likely influenced the perspectives within the spiritual community.

Ancient Shinto, Shugendo, and even Buddhism emphasize the importance of physical well-being. However, for those who have only superficially dabbled in spirituality, there is often a focus on the mental aspect or intellectual understanding, leading to a neglect of the body. In recent spirituality, there is often a focus on thinking or meditation, and activities that are "other than the body." This suggests a weaker connection to the physical body. While Japanese people tend to have a strong mental development compared to other countries, this strength can lead to a tendency to underestimate the importance of the body. Obesity, of course, affects the mental state, and smoking also affects the mental state. In yoga, the focus is on the body first, with postures being the foundation, followed by breathing exercises after ensuring proper breathing through practices like nasal irrigation.

In Japan, mental distress is often treated as a sign of mental abnormality, but in reality, it is often caused by physical problems. Therefore, if the cause is identified and treated, the problem can be resolved. There are likely many cases where it is misdiagnosed as a mental illness, but in many cases, the underlying cause is physical. If a physical illness is identified as the cause, treatment should be provided. Sometimes, what is perceived as mental distress is simply diabetes. There are likely many people who experience this pattern: they experience physical problems due to diabetes, are treated as unsuitable by their superiors, subjected to power harassment and bullying, and forced to resign, eventually leading to social withdrawal. In my case, I was fortunate to be good at IT, and I was able to produce results even when I was sleeping during work, so it didn't cause too much of a problem. However, in a normal workplace, sleeping could lead to being forced to resign.

For a while now, one of the nicknames I've had in real life is "Moomin," which was given to me because I was fat and looked dazed. However, I've been working on resolving my obesity, and I feel like I'm gradually losing that appearance.

Now that I think about it, energy isn't just obtained through food; it's also taken in from space, especially from the Sahasrara chakra on the crown of the head. If that chakra is closed, it needs to be opened first. Once it's open, energy will flow in even without eating much, so a light diet that's just enough to maintain the body is sufficient. When you're young, your body is growing, so you should probably eat a bit more, but once your body has grown, I think it's probably fine to eat a moderate amount of food as a supplement to the energy coming from the Sahasrara chakra. If you do that, your weight will naturally decrease.

Even though my stomach is still protruding, recently my weight has been trending downwards.