When I was in elementary school through junior high school, my classmate, who was fairly close to me, was translating records from the Pleiades, a niche area of the New Age movement that was popular at the time. His parent was helping a certain organization translate the records of Billy Meier, a Swiss contactee. My friend was reading those records, and he would constantly boast about what was written in them, saying, "Don't you know this?" He would talk about these kinds of stories as if they were true, even though they were the kind of occult stories that were also covered in magazines like MU, and I felt bothered by it. However, he was the first one to introduce me to the basic concepts of the New Age, and at one point, he lent me a book, so I read the contact records. There were definitely things that made me think, "Well, I see," but the way he would condescendingly say, "Don't you know this?" with a smug expression, just made me feel annoyed. Looking back, this experience has become a part of my spiritual knowledge. I think I was around 10 years old at the time.

At that time, my friend recommended a book that was published by Tokuma Shoten or something like that. The book was about the basic universal laws of the universe, the Kundalini experience, and of course, UFOs. I thought, "What is this?" But because my friend was so boastful and annoying, I sent a letter to the address listed at the back of the book, and I started receiving some newsletters and publications. This was probably when I was in junior high or high school.

The newsletters had some interesting things written in them, but when I think back to that time, I still feel that the writing in the New Age publications had a certain smug tone, which I found subtle but unpleasant. It was about an ascension that would occur, dividing the people of the world into those who would survive and those who would die, and that we were the ones who would survive... It seems like it was a kind of elitist ideology. The period that that organization was talking about has long since passed, but in reality, no such ascension has occurred. And after several decades, I suddenly remembered it and searched online, and I found that they are still saying the same things about ascension, the division of humanity, and a major disaster. I realized that this is what is called a new religious movement with apocalyptic ideas.

When I visited what seemed to be the headquarters of that organization, I was told something like, "Your aura is bad," and for some reason, there was a machine that took aura photos, and they told me to take a picture without charging me, and I was forced to have my picture taken. Because the picture turned out poorly (darker colors), I was relentlessly and persistently criticized in front of everyone present, and I was humiliated and felt very uncomfortable. I think that's the kind of thing that happens with new religious movements. From my perspective, since I'm lowering myself into this heavy vibrational dimension in order to experience the depths of this world, it's natural for my aura to be darker. However, they seemed to be judging people based on the color of their aura. Even people who are considered to have "good" vibrations in this world are far below in terms of vibration from a higher dimension, so the color of the aura, whether it's beautiful (bright) or dark, is only a matter of degree from a higher perspective. After all, it's just a Kirlian photograph.

Furthermore, the color of the aura that can be captured in a photograph (Kirlian photograph) is closer to emotions, so it changes frequently. Therefore, I thought that the organization that classifies people into a hierarchy based on whether it's black or white is misunderstanding the essence. If they say things like that, it becomes impossible to be near people with "bad" vibrations. Once you've grown spiritually to a certain extent, you become less affected, but before that, if such a hierarchy is created, even if you're not spiritually advanced, you can maintain a beautiful aura by being careful not to have "bad" vibrations. However, I don't think it's very meaningful to maintain an aura color by being careful like that.

Moreover, you can't know whether the state of a person's aura is good or bad at that particular moment without knowing their life plan. However, that organization was dividing people based on the color of their aura, saying that people with "bad" auras are "on the path to extinction." Conversely, the people who are overly sensitive to the color of their aura and avoid getting their aura "dirty" are those who are fixated on their sense of superiority and are unwilling to interact with others. These people may not be needed for the future of the Earth, don't you think? This reminds me of a story similar to "Amélie." The people who lived with a sense of superiority and were seeking salvation would not be saved even if a major disaster occurred. Instead, the people who helped others without worrying about their own "dirty" aura are the ones who deserve praise and would be the first to be rescued even in a major disaster. (However, if something like that really happens, luck is the most important thing, and after surviving, those who are helping others would be prioritized, to some extent. There wouldn't be that much of a difference. After all, the story of "Amélie" is just a story. I don't think they would consider someone's background when helping them during a disaster.)

Even if it was a new religious movement, I was able to learn the basics of New Age. In fact, through various experiences with out-of-body experiences, I discovered that I have a certain connection with the members of that group, and that's why I was drawn to it. However, even so, there were many questions about what that group was doing.

Looking back, both that group and "inner game" seem to involve stages of manipulation, control, and codependency.

For me, the period from childhood to around the age of 20 was my first cycle of spiritual exploration. In this first cycle, I learned the basics of spirituality and also witnessed its negative aspects, leading to a sense of disillusionment.

Then, after the age of 20, I felt the need to live in reality, so I started with work. While spirituality is certainly a fundamental and important aspect, I felt that it was necessary to live in reality. So, on the surface, I lived in reality, but behind the scenes, I started my second (or 1.5th) cycle of spiritual exploration. This was different from the first cycle, which lasted until around the age of 20, and I tried to make it more grounded. By my mid-30s, I felt that the second cycle (or 1.5th cycle) was coming to an end, and I felt that I had reached a point where I could balance spirituality and reality. At that point, I didn't feel like I was particularly knowledgeable about spirituality, but at least I felt that I had achieved a balance between reality and spirituality, and that I had laid the foundation for a third (or second) cycle.

Then, in my late 30s, the third cycle (or second cycle) began, and I started practicing yoga and meditation seriously. In my 40s, I am experiencing growth at a different pace than before. However, all of this is because I went through my first cycle of spiritual exploration from the age of 10, and then I lived in reality in my second cycle (or 1.5th cycle), and based on those experiences, I am now in my third cycle (or second cycle). It's clear that I couldn't have achieved this growth in one leap.