I am relatively young, having only reincarnated twice since separating from the group soul. However, I have memories from various past lives within that group soul, and in one particular past life, which forms the core of my soul, I struggled with psychic abilities.

In that past life, I possessed considerable psychic abilities, avoiding evil spirits by sensing them, wrapping them in bandages to subdue them, and using precognition to ensure I wouldn't lack for sustenance. I essentially had free rein.

However, in the few reincarnations before returning to the group soul, I became quite exhausted. Living in this world, teeming with all sorts of entities, was a difficult situation.

It seems I was a psychic who dealt with emotions in the astral dimension, and I was struggling because I hadn't transcended to higher dimensions like the causal or Buddhic planes.

Based on my past soul history, I was originally a being close to a divine spirit. Tracing back to a life from a very distant past, I remember living with a consciousness similar to the causal plane or even a higher dimension, with my consciousness spread across multiple dimensions. However, as I reincarnated, my vibrations decreased, and I gradually descended from the Buddhic plane to the astral, emotional dimension. Since the astral dimension is inhabited by spirits and ghosts, it's understandable that I became exhausted from living in a world where I constantly saw strange entities and landscapes reminiscent of the underworld.

Despite this exhaustion, I returned to the group soul, and a new soul fragment was created. This fragment was slightly different from my original self, but it inherited certain challenges. A spiritual guide then told me something.

The guide said that I could overcome my limitations by losing my psychic abilities and accepting all emotions, spirits, and strange entities without resistance. Specifically, I should reincarnate while wearing a special spiritual cloak, which was used in the past to forcibly nullify psychic abilities and undergo training. Although it's rarely used now, the guide suggested I try it. "It will be a good training experience," she said.

The cloak has a special sealing function, and the seal can be broken by chanting a specific mantra or by someone tearing it. I tried it out, and as soon as I put it on, I couldn't see any spiritual entities,魑魅魍魎, or even ordinary spirits. It was like living in complete darkness, and I was terrified. However, when I chanted the mantra, the seal was released, and the cloak came off. The guide then said to me, "Accept all emotions, spiritual entities,魑魅魍魎, and evil spirits. Understand that everything is part of nature, no matter what happens. This is all part of your training. While wearing this cloak, you won't be able to avoid evil spirits, but by confronting them, you will become stronger. You will also suffer because you won't understand the meaning of it all. However, you are already suffering in this world, which is full of evil spirits, and you want to overcome it. This cloak will help you in your training, and it will also protect your body and aura. Although you will encounter more suffering, you will also grow faster because you are protected by the cloak." I believe this is what she said.

At that time, I wished to create a self that could stand against those entities and not be affected by them, rather than simply living quietly in the world of魑魅魍魎. In reality, my childhood was very difficult, and I probably wanted to die about a thousand times. However, I managed to survive and make it to the present.

Now, I realize that I was unable to deny my abilities and was relying on them. By being forcibly stripped of my abilities through the cloak, I was able to deny them and move on to the next stage.

As stated in "The World as Will and Representation" by Arthur Schopenhauer, "To transition from the world of objects to the realm of pure spirit, one must shed all characteristics, powers, and abilities that belong to the world of objects." It's difficult to deny these things, whether in life or death. One must surrender everything to God and abandon oneself completely to enter the Buddhic plane.

The world of objects is what is meant by "Prakriti," while the realm of pure spirit is the Buddhic plane, which is a stage slightly closer to a divine spirit. It seems that even the causal plane, which is before the astral and causal dimensions, has a strong influence of the world of objects, and especially in the astral dimension, there is interaction with spirits, and in the causal plane, there is light and intellectual bliss. However, even that must be denied in order to reach the divine realm.

I am not yet at that level, but I understand that the direction is the same as what is said in the Yoga Sutras, such as "Do not be attached to abilities, even when they appear."

In my case, I was born with the cloak, so I probably would have tried to live an easy life by relying on my abilities if I had them. However, I think that's fine to some extent after reaching a certain stage, but it's important to make an effort at the beginning.

The guide didn't say much, but she essentially pushed me into the valley of the wolves, and now I realize that she was quite strict.

However, thanks to her, I was able to deny the psychic abilities I had relied on and move on to a higher stage.

It felt like I made a decision to surrender my life and death to God.

I was born with a certain sense of purpose, as if I had already made peace with the possibility of death. I think I have already overcome the major challenges, so for now, I believe my decision was successful.